8 Things I Learned in Church About Sex

With Valentine’s Day coming up tomorrow, many people are thinking about relationships, love, marriage, and yes, we can’t forget about sex. People might not talk about it a lot, but it is definitely on minds during this Valentine’s Day season. I’ll be honest, when I thought about what I wanted to write this week, I didn’t think that it would be about sex. This is not typically a subject that I talk about on a large-scale like this. So needless to say, this post is pushing me outside of my comfort zone… but that’s a good thing right?

This Sunday at my church, my pastor, Bishop Johnson,  preached about God and Sex. Needless to say it was a “hot” sermon… and I will be honest… I felt myself blushing a time or two throughout the sermon.  There is not a lot of talk or sermons about sex, but it is a very important topic that should be talked about, especially in church. We need to be guided into truth by God when it comes to sex. The Bible has a lot to say about sex and so it is important to God. The message today was so good that I just had to share a few nuggets with you all.

One very important thing to note is that this message referred to sex within a committed marriage relationship between a man and a woman. It’s important to keep that in mind as you read this post.

Alright ya’ll…. buckle up, hold on tight, and let’s begin!

Sex is good because God created it.

Sex is such a taboo subject, especially in churches. Many people avoid conversations about it altogether…like it’s a bad word. The world has perverted sex and has made it something that people shy away from and almost treat it like its a bad thing. Sex is actually good. The way the world portrays sex is not how God intended it to be.  God created sex, He is the expert on sex. Sex is good because everything He creates is good. He designed our bodies to have sex, and enjoy it. The pleasure that comes from sex is also good, because God designed it that way. More on that later. 😉

The first thing God commanded Adam and Eve to do was to have sex.

I never really looked at the following verse in this way. “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it”.  (Genesis 1:28) In the back of my mind I always knew that’s what the verse meant, but I never really stopped to think about what it was that God was really telling them to do. It was important enough to God for Him to tell them to do that first. Sex within marriage is extremely important to God. He created sex to join a man and a woman together and to replenish the earth. 

God did not design sex just for procreation. 

While procreation is one of the most amazing results of sex, that is not the only reason God created it. Another thing that really stood out in the message was that of all the days in a month, there are only a certain amount of days that a woman can conceive. The other days, a woman can engage in sex and not have to worry about pregnancy. That right there shows that God designed things so that a woman can have sex for coming together with her husband and for enjoyment and not just for creating a baby. I never really thought about this in that way, but it totally makes sense. When a woman does not have to worry about pregnancy, she can be completely relaxed and does not have to feel limited in the act of coming together with her husband. Side note:  Even though sex is not JUST for conceiving a baby, to think that the act of it can result in the beginning of another human life is amazing! 

Sex is an act of worship.

While sex provides a source of pleasure it is also considered one of the greatest acts of worship to God. Sex is actually one of the most spiritual things you can do with your body. It is a spiritual experience ordained by God to bring two people together. I remember my mom gave me a book to read years ago (before I got married) called Sacred Sex: A Spiritual Celebration of Oneness in Marriage. I remember reading that book and having a better understanding of God’s purpose for sex in marriage. That book was one of the best books I have ever read about sex. It helped me to see sex not just as something that brings physical pleasure, but that it is a means by which to worship God and promote oneness in marriage. It was a great book and I need to read it again! 😉

Sex brings oneness in marriage.

Many times when people talk about sex, they talk about the “Big O”.  While the “Big O” as we know it can be amazing, it is not the main point when it comes to sex.  According to the book Sacred Sex, the “Big O” in marriage is ONENESS.  The other “Big O” can be part of the process, but is not the final destination. When oneness becomes the main focus, everything else that follows is a byproduct of that oneness.  It’s also important to note that when a couple engages in sex, there is a joining of those two people in many ways. There is an emotional joining and a spiritual joining that we do not fully understand. Sex is a spiritual mystery. In Ephesians 5:31-31  it states that “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery…” When one joins themselves with someone sexually, they are giving that person a part of themselves and  that is a serious thing. Because sex is such a mystery that only God knows and understands, there are many unknowns when it comes to it. That’s why it’s important for sex to be experienced within a committed marriage relationship. 

The pleasure that comes from sex was God’s idea.

This was a really good point that Bishop Johnson made in the message yesterday. Even though sex is a way that we are able to worship God, it’s also important to note that the pleasure that comes from sex (within marriage) was also God’s idea. That pleasure is not something that we “accidentally” experience.  In 1 Cor 7:3 it states, “Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.” The “due benevolence” that is being referred to in this scripture is the act of sex that provides goodness and kindness to your spouse. God wants us to be able to experience this “goodness and kindness”, and when we do, we will be reminded that He is the creator of that experience and that He is so good. It will drive us to worship Him and give Him thanks for this! So you see, pleasure from sex is a good thing.

God created our bodies to experience that pleasure.

Another thing that stood out in the message was that God created our bodies, and designed them to enjoy sex. According to science, there is a specific part of a woman’s body that has no other purpose but to make sex more pleasurable. God saw fit to create that specific part of the body to respond in a certain way that provides pleasure only during sex. That shows that He thought about every detail when it comes to this. I had never really thought of it like this before but it really makes sense!

Heaven is way better than sex.

When we get to Heaven, there will be no sex taking place. We will be so busy worshiping God and experiencing His presence that sex won’t even be something we desire. Sex is just a taste of how good the presence of God is…It is a type of God’s goodness.  Through sex, a husband and wife are able to experience God’s presence when they come together. As wonderful as sex is, God’s presence is so much more amazing! Can you imagine that??? While I enjoy life here on earth and the benefits of sex in marriage, I definitely look forward to experiencing the presence of God in Heaven!

Sex within marriage is God’s idea and is a wonderful thing. Like I mentioned in last week’s post (which you can read here), marriage is what makes sex great. God intended for sex within marriage to bring oneness and to glorify Him while experiencing the pleasure that comes with it. When you engage in sex with your spouse you are saying the following: I’m committed to you, emotionally, spiritually and exclusively. What is better than that???

So dear friends, what are your thoughts about this hot topic? I would love to hear them. Please share in the space below.

Gr8fully Yours,